doin' in

Back in the day when I was in junior high and the early part of high school, I had a strange love for hip hop. One of the first artists I grew fond of was LL Cool J. This was around the time his album Mr. Smith was released.

I rememember it like it was yesterday - Christmas Eve, 1995 - Dawn, my sister, and I were in Target shopping for our parent's presents. She asked what I wanted for Christmas. I knew exactly what I wanted. I said, 'I'll be back with it,' and ran to the music section.

Moments later I held it up. She looked at me with crazy eyes and said, 'If you ever tell mom and dad I bought this for you, you're dead!'

Don't worry Dawn, they never found out (but if you would like to know, she did buy me my first parental advisory cd). Until one day, my mom moved cars around before school. She comes back in with the rage of a thousand suns in her eyes. 'What the hell is the cd in your car?!'

'TLC?'

'I would hope not. Tonight, I want you to bring it in the house and I want to watch you break it in half.'

Nervous and freaked out, I get into my car to find Nas' song 'Big Girl' playing.

Big Girl
CD skip when your head board hit the wall
Call for the law
Right when you cum, I'm biting your tongue
Make your legs cramp up, you can't stand up
You can hit a blunt if you want

I never came home that night and broke the cd in two. And she never asked about it again.

Today, my love for hip hop still exists. I still love the dirty rap and thanks to artists like Lil' Kim and Foxy Brown, I can sing/rap along. Mollie always makes me rap Lil' Kim. She laughs and so do I. And then I wonder, 'how the hell did I remember that?'