11.26.2006

angry, drunk idiot


Something very strange happened Saturday night. Mollie, Matt and I left Citrus to go to Homey Inn. While on Saddle Creek a man was riding Alice's ass. As we turn left to make our way closer to the bar, the man driving behind speeds up and almosts runs into the front of my car. He is yelling and cursing at me to pull over. So, to see what his problem was I pulled over at the gas station.

He jumped out of his car and ripped off his jacket. Red-faced and sweaty, his hands were gripping Alice's window.

'Are you from fucking Iowa?!'
'Yes.'
'So can you not fucking signal - you cut me off motherfucker!!!'
'Where? If I did I apologize.'

More yelling went on, a lot more (I can't remember the exact dialogue, but above is the jist of it). I think I went into standby mode because he scared me. He was taller than me, and much bigger. My ass would have been on the ground. I wasn't in the fighting mood - i had on good jeans and I was tired. The jackass was pulling at Alice's window. Mollie thought he was going to break it. If that were the case, I would have gathered up enough energy to break his ass like the ninja I am.

I thank the man who told the guy to go away - he has good karma coming his way. All passengers and Alice are ok.

6 comments:

Katie said...

whoa baby! i didn't get the full extent of this monstrosity when you were describing it to me over the phone. i'm glad you're all okay!

Bryan said...

Wow! Quite the exciting life over there in the midwest. You showed a lot of mercy by not going ninja on his ass. Personally, situations like this are why I try to always keep a pair of nunchucks handy. You never know when you'll need to go all Chuck Norris on somebody in the subway.

Danelle the Photographer said...

LEARN HOW TO DRIVE IOWIAN...HAHA JK.

i hate you ron burgandy.

you are a poop mouth.

you talk and poop comes out.

JLauren said...

OMG, what in the world!!

I bet Alice didn't appreciate having grubby hands on her window!

What is WRONG with people.

MikeO said...

As Molly would say..he is bad "chi"

Love,
Mike

Lucas said...

peace be with you, babe.