So today I had to take a drug test for the new job. I always get nervous about this, because last time I took a test like this is ended messy. The last urine test I took was for First National and I was nervous I wouldn't piss enough in the cup. I go in, do my thing. In the middle of my thing I notice the pee isn't really filling the cup up. Before I know it, my hands are soaked in my own urine due to a crack being on the bottom of the cup. I call for the nurse, but then realize my pants are down. It was a hot mess.
So today, I actually had to pee for several hours, but wanted to hold it in case I couldn't go again. I get there, the guy takes his sweet time talking on the phone as I'm about to wet myself. I finally go. After inspecting the cup for defaults, I go. While I'm going my guy goes cock-eyed and hits the rim of the cup. Piss goes everywhere - the floor, me, the toilet. Of course it had to get on me, like I pissed myself. I thought to myself, I will never see this guy again, so I don't care if my pants are wet. So I hid the best I could and left immediately.
Let's pray I don't need to go back in in case they lost my sample.